Showing posts with label rainer junge. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rainer junge. Show all posts

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Have You Been Working Out Part 3

Alright, so I introduced you to the people you are going to meet at the gym and the ways to fit in...now that you are there and in the habit of working out, there are four people that you need to stay away from if you want to stay focused. It is natural to slowly lose motivation to get down there in the first place, your life gets busy or you have other interests that seem more enjoyable than working out. Sometimes it's your bratty ass kids, your significant other or your job...all factors. The distractions facing you once you get there are almost as numerous.

Luckily, if you know how to make your workouts more disciplined and you can steer clear of these four people, you can fight back and stay on course to achieve your fitness goals. At least I hope you can.

No.4 - The Hot Chick (or maybe not)

 

This is a rule that will only apply to some of you (obviously), whereas others should make a beeline in her direction right away. Why the contradictory advice? Let me explain.

If seeing a hot chick in the gym sends your dopamine through the roof and you can barely control your procreative zeal then she is best avoided unless you want to injure yourself attempting some ludicrous personal best on the bench press. Been there done that.

On the other hand, if you can control yourself a bit better and use the (my iGoogle word of the day) pulchritudinous sight to inspire you to display your peacock feathers by training harder, stricter, and in an altogether more controlled fashion, then by all means make that beeline for the gym hottie!


Ladies, the same goes for you...just substitute girl for guy...you all have dopamine too


No.3 - Gadget Man

Every gym has one of these losers. His waist is synched in by the latest Valeo belt, he has heavy duty lifting gloves imported from Canada, a bench press suit from the States, hand chalk, a do rag, and Otomix trainers.

And he puts all these on just to do 3 sets of 10 on the leg extension and has only been using the gym for 3 months. He would have started a year ago but he didn’t think it would be worthwhile until he had all his gear ready.

Such people miss the point entirely and will suck you into their world of excuses if you let them. Whilst having the latest gadgets and gizmos can be good thing (I ensure that I've used all of them between Fitness First and Rainer Junge) they are no substitute for hard work and are only “icing on the cake” extras. Waiting until things are “perfect” is just plain silly as every week you delay is a week lost when you could have been making progress towards your goals. Get your sh*t together people...and by sh*t I don't mean accessories.

No.2 - Show Offs

Ladies, forgive me for referring to men here again but it sounds better on paper...definitely goes both ways though. When the pretty girl walks past we can’t help but subtly flex something or put an extra 20kg on the bar. However some characters are far worse than others. Please don’t get sucked into the poundage game with the moron who lives on the bench press, bounces the bar off his chest as if his sternum was a trampoline, and lifts his a$s so high up the bench it looks like he is being pleasured by the Invisible Woman.

Good lifting form is always paramount and "you are not in the gym to impress your mates" (Mike Magee voice) -- most of you are there to get the best results possible so that when you leave the gym you impress potential mates. There is a difference. Think about it.

No.1 - People Who Are At The Gym To Make Friends

If your training takes more than an hour, you are socializing more than you are working out. In between sets keep your head down, your mind focused, and take note that "cortisol levels rise and testosterone levels drop off a cliff if you try to push a weight training session much past the hour mark."

There will always be a bunch of guys who treat the gym as an extension of a boys club -- usually they are old timers at the gym who haven’t improved their physiques since the Berlin wall has been down. Do what I do to counteract these time vampires -- look grumpy and intense, and wear an iPod even if you don’t necessarily happen to be listening to any music!

Do What You Do      Hallelujah Hollaback       ...blackhercules21...

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Have You Been Working Out Part 2

Yesterday I hit you with part one, the people you will surely run into at any gym worldwide. And like I said, it’s that time of year again; nicotine patch sales are increasing, bottles of alcohol are being left on the shelves and your gym induction is looming. When it comes to joining a gym for the first time, many will find their biggest barrier is anxiety about sticking out as the newbie. This is a justifiable concern, since gym guys can be a judgmental lot when they want to be and walking into a gym without the necessary prep can be an exercise in humiliation. After you've decided to go, spotted out the characters from yesterday, here are 10 rules to remember if you are plan on sticking it out and really want to fit in at your new gym.

No.10 - Hold Your Tongue

Anybody who is serious about their training will want to keep inter-set conversation to a minimum. You start by talking about whether Favre is really retiring this time, and ten minutes later you’re discussing the girl you banged from the club, by which point your head is no longer in the zone, your muscles have cooled and someone’s using your weights.

Just because you may be sharing the same bench does not mean you need to share opinions; interrupting people’s workouts with constant chatter is a sure-fire way to become the guy to avoid. Unless you know someone particularly well - in which case you will be able to interrupt them mid-flow to do your set without causing offense – stick to saying 'hellos', 'goodbyes' and anything directly related to the workout, i.e. can you spot me? can I share this? etc.

No.9 - Check Your Style

It is common belief that a first impression is made within seconds. From the girl on the treadmill deciding whether to chat to you, to the bodybuilder on the bench thinking about asking you for a spot, the first thing they’ll notice about you are your clothes. You don’t want to look like you’ve just wandered in off the street, nor do you want to look like you own the street.

Anything you wear should be practical and expendable; you’re going to be getting sweaty at least twice a week, so be prepared to replace every three months or so. The best look? Plain white trainers, grey jogging bottoms and a white t-shirt never fails. Don’t wear hats, and for the love of God, never, ever wear just Under-Armour.

 

 

No.8 - Stand Sensible Ground

Nothing will frustrate those around you more than having someone working out in front of the dumbbell rack, blocking everyone from it. This seems a painfully obvious error to avoid, but you’d be surprised how many people make the mistake and subsequently become the subject of silent hatred.

Wherever you choose to work out, make sure you’re not obstructing anyone or anything. It’s a simple problem to bypass, so make sure you do.

No.7 - Watch Your Mirrors

One of the biggest complaints I hear about the gym refers to ‘posers’. Being lined with mirrors, it is difficult not to catch an admiring glimpse of your pumped body in the gym from time to time. So when you do, keep it socially acceptable by making sure the eye contact isn’t prolonged and there is absolutely no flexing. However, the primary function for these mirrors is extremely important -- to monitor your training.

Wherever possible, watch the reflection of yourself working out, this is the most effective way of knowing whether you are doing things correctly or not, particularly when training alone. Now you know this, you can also avoid the major faux-pas of walking in-between the mirror and the people working out in front of it.


No.6 - Heed Advice Gratefully

The big guy (aka me) has just come over and told you that your bench press technique needs improving then shows you how to do it (and I can do that in German by the way). The uninformed may feel embarrassed and resentful at this point, but anybody who’s been training for a while can tell you this is actually gold dust -- he’s just set you on course to muscular superiority and saved you from a potential injury – so treat it as such (you're welcome). There is a flipside to this coin. Some, who love to show how hardcore they are, will evangelise about the latest workout they’ve heard of from the underground boxing circuit in Mexico City and tell you that everyone should be doing it.

If someone’s encouraging you to do exercises you’re not comfortable with, an easy way to shake them is to say you’re going to change up your routine in a few weeks and will try to incorporate it then.

No.5 - Share Equipment

When the gym gets busy and free equipment becomes scarce, people start to double-up on machines, benches, free weights etc. You should expect to do this and not look surprised when someone asks if they can ‘jump in’ with you. What happens here is that you take turns doing a set each. Go at your own pace and don’t feel you have to do your exercise the second they finished theirs.

If you want to rest for three minutes, do it, but avoid a long, awkward wait by telling your bench buddy so they can get another set in if they want to. In the same vein, don’t be afraid to ask others if you can share the equipment with them; it’s standard gym practice. It is much better to just stroll over and ask than to hover around waiting for it to free up and freaking everyone out by watching them train.

(and speaking of sharing...if you like my blog, don't be afraid to click that little "share" button up top)

No.4 - Put Safety First

Not securing your weights correctly to the Olympic bar will cause two things: the plates to slide off, creating a horrible sound as they hit the floor, and everyone in the gym to turn and stare at you. Unless you like the idea of social isolation and injuries, make sure everything you do is safe and everything you use is stable. Common sense will see you avoid most hazards without thinking, but there are some that crop up out of fatigue or haste.

When finishing a set, put your weights down, don’t drop them and if you are resting dumbbells on anything but the floor, make sure they can’t fall or roll off. Both points are so glaringly obvious and simple they’re near comical; just make sure you take them on board, otherwise, you will end up being the gym clown.

No.3 - Go in With a Positive Mental Attitude (P.M.A.)

It is commonplace within our society to bond over negativity; complaining is acceptable in almost any situation especially when referring to the weather, public transport or the teams last loss. This does not fly in the gym. If you do get chatting to someone, remember not only to keep it brief, but also that nobody wants to hear you whining about how tough your workout is, how tired you are or that the gym is too busy.

People come in to push themselves to the limit despite the obstacles in their way, focusing on these difficulties will only bring you and them down, resulting in a less effective workout. For those around you, this issue is easily rectified: don’t talk to you again. For you, this issue is easily avoided: go in with a P.M.A.

No.2 - Know How To Spot

‘Spotting’ is the act of assisting someone as they do an exercise. If somebody asks you to spot them, you have a chance to not only break some ice with those around you, but prove your gym prowess to all in sight. If your spot-ee doesn’t tell you how many reps they’re trying to reach, ask.

Unless they request something different, follow their movement with your hands but don’t touch them until they’re really struggling to finish the exercise, then just give a very gently push, but make sure the bulk of the work is coming from them. If someone is doing any kind of press with dumbbells, support the elbows – never ever touch the weights.

 

No.1 - Master Your Technique

It doesn’t matter how well you can spot or what clothes you’re wearing, if your technique is bad you may as well stand on the bench and shout, "I’m new and don’t know what I’m doing". Your workout is the reason you are at the gym and your technique is the core of your workout, so make sure it is nothing less than perfect. It is far better to spend time on lower weights, perfecting technique than to use bigger weights with no form to speak of; serious gymmers judge you by your technique, not your weights.

Given the significance of technique, fellow gym-goers will dismiss you really quickly if you seem unaware of its importance and don’t bother to get it right. Everyone who sees you lifting incorrectly will think of you as an amateur, a hazard and, by association, will assume you guilty of all the other mistakes you’ve taken measures to avoid. Gym instructors exist to help you, so ask them to watch your technique and give you feedback.




Do What You Do      Hallelujah Hollaback      ...blackhercules21...

Friday, February 5, 2010

Have You Been Working Out Part 1

As I told you yesterday, I am back behind the wheel on the streets of Gottingen. Now with that being said, one of the things I've been able to do it get back up to Rainer Junge. Lifting is a big part of my weekly schedule and Rainer Junge is the weightroom we usually lift at. It's a ten minute drive away so while I was "wheel less" I had to resort to working out at Fitness First, which is just a hop skip and a jump down the block.

Both gyms are good in their own way, Rainer Junge doubles as a physical therapy center so the weightroom it's not as crowded and the equipment is top-notch. Fitness First is our version of NYSC or Crunch so the trainers will push you a little harder and there is a lot more weight to be thrown around by yours truly.

Now I'm aware that as of January 1st a lot of us decided that spare tires look better in the trunk of our cars rather than around our waists.  And with that realization, we probably joined a new gym...since this was something that was relatively new to me (I've been working out at the same gym since highschool), I didn't realize the kind of people that frequent "the gym" and by "the gym" I mean every gym from New York and New Jersey to Gottingen Germany...but now I know...enjoy this blog dedicated to the people who visit (y)our local gym.

gym-montage
If I’ve missed any, please don’t hesitate by letting me know with the usual “omfg I can’t believe your dumbass missed” type of comment.

Chick Who Is Just There To Socialize
flirting-at-gym
This will happen more so at Fitness First. She's the attention whore...a good looking female who might do 5 crunches during her time at the gym.  She’s there to socialize and bathe in the attention and looks that she’s getting from every straight guy within range.  However, you’re not allowed to stare at her tights that have been hiked into her ass crack.  Why?  Because only pigs do that, and she’ll let you know if she catches you.


The Old Man (Not Safe For Work Vid)
This will definitely only happen at Rainer Junge, the old man and his swinging nuts can make for a very interesting and uncomfortable gym encounter.  You see, the old man isn’t a perv, but he’s completely oblivious that some of his body parts peek out of his gym gear.  However, explaining to him that everyone can see his gray bush during situps, and his wrinkled sack during squats is even more uncomfortable.  In this situation, it’s best to just ignore.

The Grunter
28grunt.span
Grunters are more likely to be found at Fitness First...but grunting is unnecessary and retarded.  You get nothing from grunting that you couldn’t get from a regular exhale.  Loud grunts are just another away of saying “Hey look at me and how fucking jacked and tan I am.”  Obligatory video of guido douchebags goes here.  F*ckin’ skanks.

Fat Guy Who Keeps Farting
fat-football-player
These guys can be found at both Rainer Junge and Fitness First, and although we don't have any football teams out here, we do a guy named "Big Fish". And he's the "ghetto version" of the guy pictured above. Now the offensive lineman for your local Junior College team doesn’t really want to be at the gym.  Lucky for you and the rest of the gym, his coach wants him there on Saturdays to “put on a few pounds of muscle.”  That would be groovy, except for the fact that he was up all night doing shots of jack while washing them down with Natty Ice.  To top in off, he ate 2 plates of Johnny Rockets Chili Cheese Fries and had a milk shake to sober up.  This person is sporting a ridiculous case of mud butt, and now you’re going to suffer.

Touchy Trainer
lady-lifting-weights
I'm not going to say I've seen a touchy trainer at either of my gyms (because they are both sponsors/and great places by the way) but I know touchy trainers exist everywhere. If you’ve got female friends who attend a gym, you should ask them sometime if they’ve had a “touchy trainer.”  Some of these clowns would be full on fisting girls during their training session if they weren’t stopped.  “You’re really tight, let’s see if we can work that out!”

Girl Who Could Beat Your Ass
5
Not my ass...your ass. It really makes you feel like a worthless weak turd when you’re putting your 20 LBS dumbbell  back in the rack, only to see some hot chick, grab an even heavier set.  You can play it off (<--view that link) by acting like it was just your warm up set, but there are risk factors involved.

The Heavy Set Guy
fat guy at gym
It’s hard to say anything bad about this guy.  They get called “fat ass” and get told to “hit the gym” all of their life, and now that they’re at the gym, I'm going to clown on them again. I know I'm a bad person. But the thing is while they’re trying to burn off those McRibs, they expel a ridiculous amount of sweat.  And yea it is a gym and people are supposed to sweat but if you could have a choice between sharing a bench press with a 150 pound guy or fat Albert whose grease covered sweat smells like fast food, which one would you choose?

For all of you who have already given up on your New Year's Resolution to hit the gym...these next three blogs are supposed to be nothing but motivation to get your a$s back in gear...

Do What You Do       Hallelujah Hollaback       ...blackhercules21...

Friday, October 2, 2009

Meet The Trainers: Patrick Rissler & Andre Weimer

Peca is our Physiotherapist and Andre is our strength and conditioning coach. You will see them on the bench at every game and are just as much apart of the team as the players...therefore since the Meet The Team Series is back in full effect, I figured you should meet them.

Physiotherapist: Patrick Rissler aka Peca


aka The Joker


aka Thumbs







Strength & Conditioning Coach: Andre Weimer


aka Dre aka Andre 3000 aka 3$tack$


aka Pascal Roller


aka Verne Troyer


Do What You Do          Hallelujah Hollaback          ...blackhercules21...